You know those nights when you’re just tossing and turning in bed and you just can’t seem to fall asleep? Well, that’s my life.. every single night. I have severe insomnia and for me to actually get a good nights sleep, I have to work out for about 3-4 hours, and work another 10-14 at work, and then go out with my friends for a few hours of dancing. Seem extreme? I wish I were kidding. I need to both physically and mentally exhaust myself to try and even get a somewhat decent night of sleep.
There are some nights I get into bed at 9PM and don’t fall asleep until 7AM. It’s an issue but I’ve learned to deal with it. But, being the optimist that I have learned to be- I’ve also realized that late night thoughts are some of the most powerful. There is nothing else to distract my (always wandering) mind. I’ve realized that the thoughts I think so late at night are also some of the most genuine and beautiful thoughts I have the entire day because there is nothing else to distract me. No work, no outside forces, nothing. Just me, myself, and my thoughts.
With such a short and passive attention span- I am also that way with my romantic endeavors. I get bored with intimate relationships very easily. I’m constantly going ~621 miles a minute and there are very few who have the confidence to even attempt to keep up. But, sometimes you can meet somebody and they can help put everything into perspective, whether they last or not, their impact will. So let me tell you one thing I’ve learned from being a cynical insomniac my entire life- if there’s a person you’re thinking about when all else is dead and still in the world, they have a purpose in your life and there’s a reason you’re thinking about them.
So, let your mind wander and listen to those late night thoughts, because they are the realest thoughts you’ll have in a day. There’s a reason you can’t get somebody out of your head, let them stay there a little while.